Seven Last Words, 21st century-style

When they came to Golgotha, they crucified Jesus with two rebels, one on his left and one on his right.  Then Jesus said, “Father, I can’t breathe”.

One of them ridiculed Jesus, saying, “Aren’t you supposed to be the Messiah ben David?  Why don’t you save all three of us”.  The other rebuked him, saying, “We’ve earned our deaths, but this man is innocent.”  Then he turned to Jesus, and said, “Remember me when you come into your kingdom”.  Jesus replied, “Today I can’t breathe.

When Jesus saw his mother, with Lazarus standing beside her, he said, “Mom, I can’t breathe”.

And about three o’clock Jesus cried out, “My God, my God, why can’t I breathe?”.

When Jesus knew everything was ending, he said, “I want to breathe”.

The soldiers put a sponge filled with sour wine on the end of a branch and gave it to Jesus to drink.  When he had received it, he said, “I can’t breathe”.

Then Jesus said loudly, “Father, into your hands I commend my last breath”.  Then he dropped his head and died.