06 May 2024

On Marmite and Vegemite, and Branston Pickle


I’ve been experimenting with vegemite, marmite, and Branston pickle the past couple of weeks.

I’ve just started on marmite, which I’ve had before, after finishing the jar of vegemite, and have to admit I prefer marmite a little bit, though that may have to do with it being more easily available.  They’re very similar.

In exploring this online various uses for the condiment, I’ve seen posts by Brits and Aussies making fun of us Yanks slathering it on toast. What y’all don’t get is that here we have this thing called country ham which, if it’s the real thing, is so salty it makes your face pucker like a raisin. AND we then make redeye gravy with the scraps and grease in the pan after frying, combined with strong coffee that’s been sitting on a burner long enough to make it thick and acidy, and pour it over biscuits (American biscuits, aka scones, not what we call ‘cookies’). By comparison, both vegemite and marmite on toast are kind of tame.

Very few of us, however, would be able to eat marmite straight out of the jar with a spoon, like Julia Wicker did at breakfast in Venice in a scene in Lev Grossman’s novel The Magician King.

Marmite (and vegemite) provide a very good approximation of the taste of redeye gravy, by the way, though they’re easier to spread on toast than on biscuits (scones).

Peanut butter and mayo has been a Southern US staple since the Great Depression; I use olive oil mayo to cut out the bulk of the saturated fat.  Several months back, I started adding guacamole too, for the avocado in it, and the guacamole because it has more taste.  I’d tried first using straight mashed avocado, but that isn’t potent enough to complement the peanut butter when paired with it.

One day the other week, I had a vegemite, peanut butter, and guacamole sandwich with mayo, plus sun-dried tomatoes. Everyone says to put the mayo and/or butter on first, but I did that and the other way around would be better.  Also, now that I had the vegemite in combo with other things, I can see what you Brits and Aussies mean about vegemite and marmite needing just a little. On my sandwich, the taste overwhelmed everything and I didn't even use much.

I also figured out that mashed avocado like some supermarkets have would be better than the guacamole, which the marmite or vegemite overwhelms.

After seeing DCI Humphrey Goodman espousing the virtues of a cheese-and-pickle sandwich on Death in Paradise, I knew I had to try it.  Luckily, I found one of the grocery chains here in Chattanooga carries Branston pickle.  I love the Branston pickle, but to really balance its flavour I would need about half a pound of cheddar.  And V is right; grated is better than sliced in this case.

The ultimate test was the sandwich on toasted whole wheat with peanut butter, along with both Branston pickle and marmite, sun-dried tomatoes, guacamole, and shredded cheese.  What I mean by ultimate test is that my effort to see how marmite and Branston pickle blended, and the result was that if you’re wondering which is more potent, it’s the Branston pickle, with which I could barely taste the marmite, even after my second or third try when I slathered an American amount of marmite.

Since then, I keep marmite and Branston pickle separate on sandwiches, only using one or other.  And yes, usually with peanut butter, and sometimes even mayo.

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